overprotective mother

Dear Karly,

My parents are waaay too over overprotective!! They always want to know where I’m going, what I’m doing, and when I’ll be back! How can I deal with my overprotective parents?

Alexa, 13

Hi Andrew,

Having overprotective parents is a problem that many kids your age struggle with. It’s frustrating to be forced to tell your parents everything you’re doing when you feel old enough to have your privacy.

Communicate your frustrationstalk to your parents about your problem. You can’t expect your parents to read your mind. Tell your parent how you feel. Many parents are overprotective simply because they love you.  Tell them that it bothers you. Listen to their responses. They may be simply overprotective and overly fearful. But sometimes they may have some wisdom that you lack, simply due to being older. When you know why they act the way they do, it will be easier following their rules.

If you want to keep your privacy, you need to learn what boundaries are appropriate given your age group. For example, you can tell them it’s okay to be concerned about your physical wellbeing but not make you tell them what you ate for lunch each day. It’s not unreasonable for your parents to want to know where you go after school. However, it is okay to request that your parents stay out of your room and don’t go through your things, for instance. Don’t fight them on every little thing, and when you don’t agree with them, be respectful.

Show your parents you’re capable of making good choices. If you want your parents to worry less, show them you’re responsible.

And always remember: Controlling parents are still parents. You love them, they love you.

Good luck!


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