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Clingy Friend

clingy friend
Dear Karly,

My neighbor is so pushy and clingy, what should I do to get her off my back?

Clingy Friend, 14

Hi Clingy Friend,

Your neighbor is in the way and gets you upset because she hangs out with you too much. That can be annoying!

Before you change anything in your relationship, make sure that what she’s doing is really too much, and it’s not just a one-time thing. After confirming that she’s being inappropriate, you can change the way you act towards your friend.

The first thing to keep in mind is to act polite and friendly-she is your friend after all! But, you can limit the time you spend together. Don’t make yourself completely available at any hour of the day or night if it’s to an unhealthy extent.

You should learn to say no to her when you cannot spend time with her. You can tell her you’re busy without sounding rude. If she’s dragging you down with her neediness, you can create boundaries. For example, say “I love spending time with you, but we spent the entire afternoon together. Today I’d rather stay home”

You don’t have to excuse yourself; you can explain to her what you want and don’t want to do.

And always remember: Stick to your boundaries!

Good luck,
Karly

 

Karly

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